stress

Herbert M. Lefcourt’s work on the locus of control fundamentally changed how we understand human behavior and motivation.

The concept is simple: it’s about how people view control over their lives. Are they in control or driven by forces they can’t control?

Lefcourt distinguished between two types of people. Those with an internal locus of control believe they can influence outcomes. They act, problem-solve, and adapt. Those with an external locus of control think life happens to them. They react.

The difference is enormous.

Internals? They engage in deeper thought and are proactive in nature. They handle stress better. They see challenges as problems to solve, not as fate.

Externals? They tend to let things slide, chalking it up to luck or external circumstances.

Lefcourt’s legacy is not just in defining this construct. He created tools to measure it. And his work has shaped fields as diverse as clinical psychology, education, and even corporate management.

Here’s the takeaway: How you view control over your life will shape everything—from your stress response to your success at work.

People either pull the strings or they’re puppets of the system. Locus of control is what decides it.

Photo by Daria Nepriakhina 🇺🇦 on Unsplash

“I’m Just No Good at…”: Navigating the Pressure of Living up to Others’ Expectations

We’ve all heard the phrase “I’m just no good at…” at some point in our lives. Maybe it’s something you’ve said to yourself, or someone else has said to you. It’s a phrase that can hold a lot of weight, especially when it comes to living up to the expectations of others.

Making Others Happy

It’s natural to want to make others happy and meet their expectations. However, when we constantly strive to live up to the expectations of others, we can start to lose sight of our own goals and desires. We may even begin to believe that we’re not capable of achieving certain things based on missing other people’s wants, which can lead to feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem.

Problems

One of the main problems with living up to the expectations of others is that they’re often unrealistic. We may be expected to excel in areas where we have no natural talent or interest or to live up to impossible standards. This can be particularly challenging if we compare ourselves to others who have been given more opportunities or resources.

Another issue with living up to the expectations of others is that it can be draining. We may feel like we’re constantly under pressure to perform and meet those needs. This can lead to feelings of stress, anxiety, and even burnout.

How to Break Out

So, what can we do to navigate the pressure of living up to others’ expectations? One of the most important things is to set personal goals and focus on what we want to achieve. We should also ensure that we’re not comparing ourselves to others and that we’re not measuring our success based on the standards of others.

Remembering failure is a natural part of life is also essential. We’re all going to make mistakes, and we’re all going to fall short of our goals at times. It’s important to be kind to ourselves and not beat ourselves up when things don’t go as planned.

Ultimately, living up to the expectations of others is challenging, but it doesn’t have to define us. We should focus on our goals and aspirations and remember that we can achieve great things separate and beyond the expectations of others.