Search Results for: fear
The Thing About Fear
In 1933, Franklin D. Roosevelt spoke to the nation in his first inaugural address including this powerful statement; “…let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself – nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance”. Those sentiments stand the test of time even today.
Fear is common to all humans and most animals (apparently apart from the honey badger).
Hard Wired
Thousands of years ago, humans were wired with the fear response as it was critical to the survival of our species in a world filled with dangers. The fear response prepares the body to fight, flight or freeze. It also triggers the release of stress hormones like cortisol and adrenalin.
Fear is often more anticipatory than reactive. In Letters from a Stoic, first-century Stoic Philosopher Seneca wrote: “There are more things…likely to frighten us than there are to crush us; we suffer more in imagination than in reality.” We worry over things that could happen even when there is no immediate threat to our wellbeing – but the body doesn’t know the difference. Fear related to public speaking, dreaded conversations or confrontations, fear of failure (or success), and even fear of spiders and snakes all send a signal to the brain to release those chemicals even without the actual presence of danger. The experience of feeling fear is real even when the feared event is not.
Protection or Isolation?
In response to anxious thoughts, humans tend to create systems of rules or boundaries as a hedge of protection against experiencing the feeling of fear or anxiety. Over time, those well-intentioned boundaries can devolve into a cage that prevents personal growth and life experiences. In some cases, a person becomes held hostage by a web of fears that all derive from the stories they tell themselves about the possibility of the feared event.
The good news is that a powerful prescriptive exists – it is free and readily available.
Take Action!
That’s right – action is the best medicine. Use the fear impulse as a catalyst for action and choose to run directly at the thing you fear. Begin with simply making a choice.
- Confess your fear to someone you trust and ask them to hold you accountable as you commit to trying the things you fear. Just the act of sharing relieves some of the fear-filled weight.
- Afraid of failure? Fail. A lot. Fail again and again until the sting of failure is lessened, and the successes begin to outweigh the failures.
- Fear of public speaking? Sign up for an open mic, volunteer to speak at a company meeting or an industry function. Do it even with knees shaking, voice quivering, and a sheen of sweat on your brow. Stand up to the fear by taking action to do the thing that scares you.
- Put in the reps. By doing the thing you fear over and over, you gain confidence, experience, and skill.
- Let go of perfection as the benchmark. If you only define success as having performed perfectly, then failure is assured. Assign engagement and progress as success markers and build on those foundations instead.
Fear Less
Conquering fears is not accomplished in one fell swoop. If the thought feels overwhelming, know that it is not necessary to become instantly fearless – but just to fear (a little) less – just enough less to allow you to take the next step. Small steps lead to bigger steps and eventually to a life less encumbered by fear. Taking concrete action such as setting an appointment, replying yes to an rsvp, or signing up for a class all signal courage to your psyche. Following through on those commitments builds success on top of success. There may be plenty of fits and starts along the way, each of which teaches you that failure is not the end but simply a building block for your next success.
This quote attributed to Robert Tew hits the mark. “Sometimes what you’re most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.”
The daily videos of my blog (fka Apartment Hacker) started with this gem in 2016. One take. No edits. Authentic.
There are countless opportunities to actively engage in the things you fear. Just get started.
Want more Multifamily Collective content? Sign up to Catch the Weekly Rundown, our weekly newsletter filled with quick actionable info. It’s free, easy, and we promise not to spam your inbox!
Share this:
Multifamily #Trust30: Fear
Mike Brewer · · 1 Comment
The #Trust30 prompt today deals with the subject of fear.
My thoughts on fear took me back to the words we used when writing on the subject of fear just a few days ago. That said, I am going to use this prompt in the way providing a tip.
Multifamily customer service
I have a new manager in my portfolio; started just about ten days ago. Last week we were talking through some site specifics, concerns and areas of opportunity. In the course of the conversation we came across the subject of decision making and communication. Any good property management organization makes the allowance for people to make decisions in the moment of truth.
For many new managers, fear is front and center in those moments of truth. “What if I make a bad one?” is a common question they ask themselves. When faced with those moments; they fall on the sword of, “Let me call corporate” [a word I abhor] or “Let me ask my manager.” [An act I abhor]
Now some sales people would contend that these two statements are useful in selling. The old, “I talked to my manager and we are going to do this for you.” Knowing full well they would do it for everyone; it gives the appearance of going to bat for your new found friend. But, to speak to the point of this post, let’s agree that we don’t like that approach to making a decision.
Make a decision and let’s talk about it later
My mantra has always been; make a decision under the premise of serving the customer first. In my head, I have entrusted you with the keys to a multi-million asset and part of the expectation is that you can make good sound decisions. So exercise that muscle; I say. And, in the truly big stake moments of truth if you resort to calling me for guidance and I don’t answer, just make the decision.
I tell every new leader to face the fear of making a bad decision by just making it. The thing you fear most is the thing you do next so in the moment; act. I follow by guiding them to set a premise for their decisions by asking the following question; “If that sign outside read [Insert Your Name Here] Apartments, what decision would you make? Or lead by giving themselves a little self-talk pep-talk; “I have been called to do what is the best interest of this person that is standing in front of me right now and with that in mind, I will act and make a decision.
I end by saying that if I think we should have done something different, we will talk about it and move on. Boom done. It’s that simple.
Your enjoying the #trust30 challenge immensely contributor,
M
Share this:
Apartment Marketers – The Thing You Fear Most is the Thing You Should do Next
Fear will no doubt govern the landscape in 2010 as it relates to moving forward with your social media initiatives or lack thereof. Take comfort in the idea that – you are not on an island by yourself. Take comfort in the idea that fear has a place in the conversation. But, so does courage. The cool thing about taking action in 2010 is that many have blazed a trail – it may not be the exact trail that you or I would blaze and in the same respect it’s a good starting point.
New ideas on how to market apartments
Before you lick your chops – ready to digest the latest and greatest ideas – stop and ponder this:
“I can’t understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I’m frightened of old ones.” – John Cage
New ideas are really endless and ever evolving – take a gander Brent Williams masterful creation Multifamily Insiders if you need to get the creative juices flowing. He has amassed a countless number of amazing multifamily professionals sharing openly on every subject you can imagine. And, as it relates to fear and courage, they have no doubt shared your concerns and provided a lighthouse to guide you by. If noting else take the time this year to join in the discussion and share your concerns – you owe it to yourself and your organizations.
Technorati Tags: mike brewer, mbrewer, apartment marketing, using social media to market apartments, social media apartment marketing, multifamily marketing, John Cage
Share this:
Apartment Leasing: Selling benefits to overcome fear
Would you agree that sales is part and parcel showcasing just enough benefit to overcome another’s fear
of making a decision? I mean people by nature are afraid to make decisions and
many go so far as to put the burden on others. How many times have you made your potential resident’s mind for them? I think it was Tony Robbins that said you will make a decision when the
pain of not making it outweighs the pain of making it: the pleasure and
pain principle. That said, it is incumbent upon us to bridge that gap between fear and comfort in the leasing process.
I am interested in hearing your strategies for getting prospects over that hump in the apartment leasing process. I am especially interested in hearing the strategies for getting Mr. and Mrs. Silent to speak up. You know the prospects I am speaking of; the ones that are so scared out of their mind that they can’t even mumble word. I never did learn how to do that.
Drop us a comment as I think it will benefit the entire community of readers, especially given the current economic environment. You better believe that people all over the country are becoming more hyper-sensitive in their decision making processes. You better believe fear is going to be the biggest factor you sale against in 2009 and the better part of 2010.
In the mean time check out this great post by Seth Godin.
Apartment leasing, Apartment marketing
Share this:
The Hidden Cost of Avoidance: A Deeper Look into Suffering
Avoidance often appears as an escape from unpleasant realities. Yet, it prolongs suffering.
When we sidestep challenges, confrontations, or painful feelings, we inadvertently feed them. The temporary relief masks an accumulating burden.
Embracing discomfort, rather than fleeing it, leads to a resilient character.
We forge courage and develop the capacity to overcome even more significant obstacles through facing our fears and discomforts.
"Turning away from difficulty is like skipping chapters in a book. You may avoid some pain, but you'll miss the lessons and growth." – Mike Brewer Click To TweetThe path to personal development and enduring happiness lies not in avoidance but in courageous engagement with life.
By leaning into what scares us, we crush its power over us, turning potential suffering into a source of strength.
Share this:
- « Go to Previous Page
- Page 1
- Page 2
- Page 3
- Page 4
- Interim pages omitted …
- Page 19
- Go to Next Page »